It was a difficult decision. It was an easy decision. My wife and I recently resigned from the synagogue to which we have been members for over 25 years. It has occurred at the time of Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year.
Nominally it had to do with the present rabbi. He is an unimpressive spiritual leader. He may or may not be personally honorable. I don't know him well enough to say. But his sermons are woefully void of spiritual wisdom. Their delivery is even less impressive.
Perhaps it is a consequence of my own metaphysical journey. My deep identification with Judaism remains. It is ethnically and historically the root I relate to.
But sadly I find less and less within the practice of this religion that is meaningful to me. And, furthermore, there are no other religions in this world that offer me anything better.
As I struggle to evolve spiritually (and it is a struggle) I find that the prayers and rituals do not satisfy me. I am seeking ultimate truth, seeking to understand the nature of reality. I resonate with Buddha's admonition not to believe what I have heard but to find my own path. Although there is much to the Buddhist philosophy which I find appealing, I do not seek to become one.
In doing so I give up much. There are unintended consequences to all our choices. But I do intend to honor those traditions which are meaningful to me. Passover will always be so. It is a holiday which honors religious freedom and decries retribution and suffering. It is a time for family and loved ones to be together.
I still hold out hope that I may find a synagogue which provides me with what I need. Perhaps those whose rabbi and service is infused with Kabbalistic overtones. Perhaps those who seek to heal more through understanding and promoting tikkun, the healing of oneself and the universe.
I suspect that they exist. I just haven't found one yet. My journey is far from over. L'Shanah Tovah–A good year to all.